Holy Crap, This is Actually Happening — Aloha Snackbar Edition, October 22, 2023


The big news this week is that the United States of America still does not have a Speaker of the House, which has had the same severe effects on American lives as the Hollywood writers’ strike.



After it was confirmed that barbaric Muslim terrorist regime Hamas brutally slaughtered thousands of innocent men, women, and even babies, the Canadian Broadcast System forbade commentators from using the term “terrorist,” because that is just too mean and judgy a word to use on regimes that violently kidnap, rape, and murder a specific minority. The propaganda mills for Canada’s blackface dictator complied, using instead the term “fighters,” and news outlets in the US predictably fell in lockstep. Upon hearing this, the ADL sent a spokesperson to remind legacy media that Palestinians QUOTE “are not fighters, they are terrorists.” END QUOTE

The ADL then declared itself a hate group and reported its board to the CIA.

Multiple student groups from Stanford signed a declaration in support of Hamas. Large portions of Wall Street asked for a list of members of those groups to ensure they don’t mistakenly hire any terrorists.

Other pundits reminded us that college students are renowned for being idiots, and, thanks to our liberal educational system, they’re getting dumber by the minute.

ADL leader vents on MSNBC over network’s coverage of Hamas terror against Israel: ‘Who’s writing the script?’

Stanford University students hang bedsheets DEFENDING Hamas’ terror attacks on Israel as president refuses to condemn atrocities

Early U.S. and Israeli Intelligence Says Palestinian Group Caused Hospital Blast

Documents found on fighters reveal Hamas capabilities, bloody plans

Colleges, professors face backlash amid Israel-Hamas controversies on campuses

After Writing an Anti-Israel Letter, Harvard Students Are Doxxed



After a fake-sobbing Reshida Tlaib instigated the violent insurrection at the Capitol, which the Democrats and their lapdog Press won’t call an insurrection because it’s OK when THEY do it, the rest of the Squad came out in full support of Hamas, a move that even John Fedderman denounced as moronic.

BREAKING NEWS: Rashida Tlaib Excoriates Biden After His Address About Israel-Hamas War

Fetterman shreds fellow Democrats blaming Israel in Hamas war: ‘Truly disturbing’



Speaking of moronic matches made in the opposite of Heaven, Hamas has been having an ongoing love affair with Black Lives Matter, which makes sense, as the similarities are striking. Other than Hamas’s propensity for throwing gays off buildings, both terrorist organizations engage in destroying their own towns and killing their own people while blaming their despicable actions on everyone around them. Hamas leader Yahya Sinwar compared what he called the racist killing of George Floyd, who actually died of a fentanyl overdose, to the racist killings of Palestinians, who actually attacked innocent Israelites at a music festival.

The Historic Hamas-BLM Connection




Meanwhile, the Braindonor in Chief has demanded still more money to fund both sides of both of his wars. He even gifted the terrorists yet another 100 million that they totally won’t be using to make more pipe bombs from cannibalized UN-donated water systems.

For the record, many families in Maui still have no homes.

Oh, and Russia is using trained dolphins to fight in Crimea. I swear, I am not making any of this up.



While those who vociferously support Hamas may face some personal discomfort, those who post memes the Brandon Riech doesn’t appreciate are literally sent to prison.

In the United States.

Where we used to have Constitutionally protected free speech.

Even though there are thousands of examples of Democrats doing the same, and the joke itself is as old as the election process itself, Douglass Mackey has been sentenced to seven months in prison for tweeting a fake Hillary ad in 2016.

Will the last person leaving the former free nation of America please turn out the lights.

Viral Meme-Maker Who Joked About Hillary Clinton Sentenced To 7 Months In Prison For ‘Election Interference’



But above all this, always remember, while they will wholesale ignore atrocities from their side of the aisle, the one thing the mockingbird Press will report negatively on its own side is that, under certain lighting, Joe Biden’s chin looks like a ball sack.

I swear. I am not making this up.


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