Holy Crap, This is Actually Happening — Chinese Takeout Edition, February 18, 2024

1

The big news this week is the House’s impeachment of do-nothing Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Myorkis for doing literally nothing to stop the massive invasion at our southern border. The extremely partisan vote came down to one single vote for the win.

Of course, the impeachment will not hold up in the Democratic-led Senate, because, as far as they’re concerned, he’s doing exactly what they told him to.

House impeaches Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas

Alejandro Mayorkas: House votes to impeach homeland security secretary

===

2

Foremost Group CEO Angela Chao sadly died after her car drove into a pond on a private ranch in Blanco County, Texas. She was the sister-in-law of Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell.

Even though Chao was worth billions, her Tesla apparently did not come equipped with an instant shutdown switch like Mitch has.

Foremost Group CEO Angela Chao died after car went into Texas pond, sheriff says

 

===

3

Fani “bags of cash” Willis got her beefy mitts stuck in the cookie jar after swearing that she would not be the DA that embezzled taxpayer funds or slept with her employees — then went on to do both with aplomb. During her hearing, in which she bullied the lawyers, refused to answer questions, and smirked condescending as she repeatedly committed perjury, Fani’s behavior in court only enhanced her reputation — so much so that the internet exploded with rumors that she was wearing her dress backwards after having a quickie with the bailiff during court recess.

It should be mentioned that the judge who allowed her belligerent outbursts is Scott McAfee, who worked under Ms. Wills for four years at the Fulton County District Attorney’s Office.

…good thing Fani’s a top…

Judge on Trump Case Once Worked Under Fani Willis

Judge warns Fani Willis over outbursts in heated testimony

 

===

4

A new California law has created specialized missing child alerts for black children. They call them “Ebony Alerts.”

I swear, I am not making this up.

California already had a “Feather Alert” for missing indigenous people.

No…really…I swear…not making this up.

Since “Amber Alerts” are no longer universal for missing children of all races, California’s hairspray Hitler, Gavin Newsome, has proposed new alerts such as, “Beaner,” “Slanteye,” and “Mayo Monkey.”

California new laws for 2024: Alerts for missing Black children

 

===

5

Also in the Utopian communist state of California,

Kelly Wong from Hong Kong was recently appointed to serve on the San Francisco Department of Elections. She is not a US citizen, has only been in the country for four years, and thus doesn’t have the right to vote in our elections — so she is the PERFECT person to be in charge of California’s election integrity. In fact, Wong says that she will QUOTE “be a champion for immigrant rights.” END QUOTE

…uh…immigrant rights like voting?

Yes, exactly that. She continues, “I’ve seen how language and cultural barriers prevent immigrants with limited English proficiency from fully exercising their right to vote,” and pointed out the example that there isn’t an equivalent term for the word “reparations” in Cantonese or Mandarin.

I swear. I am not making this up.

San Francisco Appoints First Non-Citizen to Sit on the City’s Elections Commission

 

===

6

While on the topic of immigrants, at least Wong is legitimate. She might be disappointed in how much time and money she wasted doing it right when she finds out that the Biden regime has been so hellbent on keeping the border wide open, that all illegal border crasher facilities are far over capacity, so ICE will simply be releasing the criminals out into the great ol’ USA and providing free transportation to wherever they desire. That’ll fix it!

ICE to release thousands of migrants due to shortfall

ICE draft plan would release thousands of immigrants in order to cover budget shortfall

===

7

Hawaii has banned the Second Amendment because of — and I swear I’m not making this up — “The Spirit of Aloha.”

Hawaii Supreme Court Declares Second Amendment Infringes on the ‘Spirit of Aloha’

 

===

8

Also on the topic of ridiculous gun-grabber rhetoric, Chicago mayor Brandon Johnson canceled the city’s contract with Shotspotter, a system that allows authorities to pinpoint the origin of gunshots, which, it turns out, helps the police catch criminals and deter further crime, thus making it racist.

You see, he says, too many blacks are arrested because whites have systematically made crimes illegal.

What Chicago mayor’s decision on ending ShotSpotter says about his leadership

What is ShotSpotter and when could service end in Chicago? Here’s where things stand

 

===

9

Because Biden’s policies have proven disastrous, his ability to communicate questionable, and his likeability is only slightly above Kamala Harris, whose likeability is only slightly above a syphilic hyena, his handlers have encouraged him to show that he is just an everyday Joe by going to a random black family’s home to talk about issues that are important to them, like basketball. He even brought them dinner: fried chicken.

I swear, I am not making this up.

But it gets better…

After the Cabbage in Chief stated that he alone talked the president of Mexico into opening their borders so their neighbors in Palestine could receive more US taxpayer monies, the Whitehouse thought it would be a good idea to show how “with it” he still is. No, really, guys, he’s hip, cool, and groovy — so they created an official account on the Chinese-controlled brainwashing tool TikTok.

Yes, the same Chinese-controlled spyware that Biden himself banned from all government devices.

‘Lol hey guys’ – Biden joins TikTok despite security concerns

Biden Hit with Backlash for Viral Post with Black Family; Things Get Worse When Viewers Notice What Food He Bought Them

 

===

10

After evil dictator Putin allowed his political rival Alexei Navalny to die in jail (although we all know he probably offed the guy himself), the Biden administration is following suit by offering fellow Democrat Nikki Haley Secret Service protection, but STILL won’t allow it for RFK Jr., because, again, if there’s anyone who is safe in this nation, it’s a Kenedy running for office.

Putin foe Alexei Navalny dies in jail, West holds Russia responsible

Haley one step closer to receiving Secret Service protection

===

11

Finally, in case you were wondering if Elon Musk’s purchase and subsequent unfettering of Twitter would finally re-open the doors of free speech, thus making the upcoming elections open and fair and the Press might actually report the news instead of just globalist propaganda, think again. Professional Bond villain, George Soros, has effectively purchased more than 220 US Radio stations with his bailout of the second largest media organization, Audacy — which also owns I Heart Radio — just in time for the 2024 elections. Nothing to see here, folks. Move along…

George Soros scoops up 220 U.S. radio stations ahead of 2024 election

===

 

For CCW News, this has been Holy Crap, This is Actually Happening.

I’m Chuck U. Farley.

Good night, and may God help us.

Leave a Reply

Name *
Email *
Website