Holy Crap, This is Actually Happening! Oh, Canada! Edition


01

While the US is trying to ban China’s brainwashing spyware TikTok in all the wrong ways and for all the wrong reasons, Canada wants to permanently jail its own citizens for mean words and “likely future crimes” based on the hurt feelings of any random snowflake.

What to Know About the Bill That Could Get TikTok Banned in the U.S.

What to Know About the TikTok Bill That the House Passed

Canadian law endorsed by Trudeau government could imprison people for life for speech crimes

Trudeau’s Orwellian online harms bill

New Liberal ‘online harms’ bill to make online hate punishable up to life in prison

===

02

But, while you will be put away for thought crimes, the Canadian government is instructing you to assist real criminals with real crimes.

The Toronto police published a PSA this week advising citizens to leave their car keys near the front door so home invaders may easily access them to steal your car.

I swear, I am not making this up.

Leave car keys ‘at front door’ to avoid violent confrontations with car thieves

===

03

But don’t worry, the Canadian government is on your side. Unless you’re a rape victim. Then their Supreme Court demotes you to “person with a vagina.”

No, I swear, this is real.

Refer ‘woman’ as ‘person with a vagina’, Canada Supreme Court rules in sexual assault case

===

04

After sexist, race-baiting, often intoxicated fake news reporter Don Lemon was fired from CNN for all of the above, Elon Musk offered him his own show on the X platform. Sexist, race-baiting, obviously intoxicated fake news reporter Don Lemon supposedly demanded millions of dollars, a Tesla cyber truck, and a pony. He began his show with an all-out hit piece on Musk himself, after which Musk rightly decided to opt out of hosting Lemon’s lemon.

Don Lemon demanded millions and Tesla cyber truck in talks with Elon Musk for a show on X

===

05

In a move that was a surprise to no one, Mike Pence announced he won’t endorse Trump. As a result, Trump’s poll ratings immediately went up by another 5%.

Pence declines to endorse Trump, won’t back Biden

 

==

06

On a hot mic, Biden said he needs to have a “come to Jesus” moment with Israel’s Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu.

No. Really. That literally came out of his cabbage hole.

Mister Netanyahu later said he had no idea what Biden was saying. That makes two of them.

Biden admits to Netanyahu ‘come to Jesus meeting’

Biden predicts “come to Jesus” meeting with Netanyahu over Gaza aid

Netanyahu, in Defiance of Biden’s ‘Red Line,’ Authorizes Plans for Rafah Offensive

===

07

French President Emmanual Macron, 47, claims that intimacy in his marriage with wife, 70, has been destroyed by the internet rumors she was born a man — and not the fact that he’s 47 and she’s 70.

French President Emmanuel Macron, 47, fires back for first time at claims wife, 70, was born a man

===

08

Thanks in part to the philanthropy of the Clinton Foundation, Haiti now reportedly has roving gangs of cannibals.

I swear, I am not making this up.

To ensure the safety of US citizens, the Biden cabal evacuated all embassies and government workers, but not a single missionary. They are now planning on importing as many native Haitians as they can fly over the border, because that’s how you fix a collapsed nation.

US election 2016: What really happened with the Clintons in Haiti?

Or, you could do the following:

===

09

After Harry Dunn and David Lazerous were proven to have perjured themselves in order to falsely imprison several oath keepers, the dirty DOJ arrested Steve Baker, the investigator who reported the coverup.

Yes, folks, we must protect our democratic republic from evil orange dictators by revoking the bulk of the Bill of Rights while imprisoning and/or assassinating all of our political rivals, whistleblowers, and honest reporters.

Proof of Perjury | The Truth About January 6

Steve Baker Says He Was Criminally Charged by FBI for ‘Scary Words’

===

For CCW News, this has been Holy Crap, This is Actually Happening.

I’m Chuck U. Farley.

Good night, and may God help us.

Leave a Reply

Name *
Email *
Website