Holy Crap, This is Actually Happening — Cinco de Mayday Edition, May 8, 2024


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The big news this week is the continued pro-terrorist, anti-Israel, riots…er…I mean “peaceful protests” on college campuses nationwide. The totally organic protests are chock full of students who can’t tell you WHY they’re protesting, but they’re doing it in fully stocked barricaded encampments equipped with professionally printed signs and matching NorthFace tents. Students say that, until their unnamed demands are met, they will continue bashing in windows, setting things on fire, and attacking any Jews they can find.

But don’t worry, boys and girls! Other than literally banning Jews from all their unsafe places, these kids prioritize diversity. In fact, the University of Washington actually postponed building their protest encampment because they couldn’t find enough brown people who wanted to sleep outside.

I swear, I am not making this up.

From the river to the sea, all parents should discontinue tuition payments.

 

Full List of US Universities Staging Pro-Palestinian Protests

Pro-Palestinian supporters and counter-protesters clash on UCLA campus over Gaza

Attacked with rocks… spat on… threatened with murder: Jewish students reveal terrifying intimidation by anti-Israel thugs – and two men who faced down a wild mob rampaging through their campus

Jewish student speaks out after being attacked on UMass Amherst campus

Jewish students say pro-Israel violence at UCLA protest camp undercut their advocacy

University of Washington anti-Israel encampment postponed over lack of diversity

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2

Meanwhile, the angry Cabbage in Chief insulted the entire nation of Japan — as well as India, China, and Russia — by calling them “xenophobic” for not inviting hordes of terrorist freeloaders into their countries like we do.

President Joe Biden calls Japan and India ‘xenophobic’ nations that do not welcome immigrants

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3

Speaking of the enemy within, Thomas Massie faced a $500 fine for sharing a video of House members excitedly and illegally waving the flag of a foreign country on the House floor after successfully voting to send billions of extorted tax dollars to Ukraine. The video received more than 7.5 million views on the platform formerly known as Twitter, which really ticked off the liberals who waved the flags.

Democrat Gaslighting 101: ALWAYS shoot the messenger.

Slightly effective House Speaker Mike Johnson reversed the decision of the Sergeant of Arms, so Massie will not have to pay the fine, after all. Sadly, we all still have to pay Voldemort Zelenskyy.

 

Speaker Johnson walks back $500 fine for Rep. Massie after GOP outrage: ‘Betrayal’

 

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Oh, but it gets better. Congress overwhelmingly voted in the Antisemitism Awareness Act, which includes wording that would make the Christian Bible illegal “hate speech.”

No, I solemnly swear, I am NOT making this up.

Republicans Voting for Bill That Could Make ‘Bible Illegal’ Outrages MAGA

 

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5

Meanwhile, Biden’s tyrannical attempts to jail his political opponent are falling apart.

Jack Smith’s biggest case exploded after many FOIA requests finally allowed less redacted documents. The more readable documents revealed that the Biden regime has been working with the General Services Administration since 2019 to come after President Trump for his possession of LEGAL presidential documents (remember, he was still president at that time), while covering for Biden’s ILLEGAL stash of all varieties of classified documents.

It turns out that the GSA actually FORCED Trump to take THEIR boxes of classified documents, which he never even opened, so the real allegations are that he accepted boxes that he somehow KNEW had super secret information, even though he never actually looked at them.

To the horror of the entire DNC — due to various “pretrial issues,” the trial has been suspended indefinitely, meaning they have one fewer tool in their 2024 cheat box.

Letitia James’s civil case, in which no victim has claimed harm in business dealings where everyone made money, but the judge hates Trump so much he’s fining him anyway — the $457 million bond was knocked down to $175 million while the whole farce is pending appeal. Letitia immediately tried to game the system by trying to say that the cash he bonded wasn’t good enough because what she REALLY wanted to do was seize his buildings. The court said she was wasting their time. Meanwhile, Ms. James is being sued by several other entities for her shenanigans, so her attention might get a little divided.

In Georgia, Fani “sleeps with her lavishly paid employees” Willis’s case is in upheaval after the court learned that both she and Jack Smith were in contact with Pelosi’s January 6 show trials.

Finally, in the hush money case, not much has happened other than revealing that the prosecution’s best witnesses are a Pecker and a porn star.

 

Trump classified documents trial in Florida postponed indefinitely

New Bombshell Evidence Emerges: Was Trump Set Up in Classified Docs Saga?

Default judgment sought after Fani Willis fails to answer lawsuit

NY Attorney General asks judge to reject $175 million bond in Donald Trump’s civil fraud case

An Irish society, an unpaid loan and the hypocrisy of Letitia James

Judicial Watch Sues Fani Willis for Communications with Special Counsel Jack Smith, Pelosi January 6 Committee

Ex-Publisher David Pecker Takes Stand as First Witness in Trump Trial

Why is David Pecker still in Trump’s good graces?

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6

On April 17, the Cabbage in Chief tried to commune with the common folk by pulling into a Pittsburgh-area Sheetz convenience store to pick up pre-ordered turkey sandwiches for airport construction workers. Just days before, Trump gathered cheering crowds and giddy employees eager to take selfies and give him hugs at Chick fil-A, but Biden’s scripted, copy-cat endeavor took place in near silence with only a few pre-selected actors engaging with him once inside. Employees did their jobs without expression, handed him the bags of hoagies, and he was in and out in a few minutes.

In completely unrelated news, on April 18, the EEOC filed a lawsuit against Sheetz, Inc for doing background checks and not hiring felons, because, according to the Biden cabal, that means they won’t be hiring any black people.

I’ll just let that one sit.

 

How a Black conservative activist arranged Donald Trump’s stop at an Atlanta Chick-fil-A

President Biden stops at Pittsburgh-area Sheetz to buy sandwiches for construction workers

EEOC Sues Sheetz, Inc. For Racially Discriminatory Hiring Practice

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7

The US military just finished a $320 million pier off the coast of Gaza that they’ve named the Joint Logistics Over-the-Shore (“Jay-Lots”) system, supposedly to facilitate delivery of humanitarian aid to Hamas…I mean Palestinian civilians…oh, who am I kidding?

When reminded that he has emphatically promised multiple times that he would never deploy US boots on the ground in this conflict, Diaper Joe assured us all that the boots were on a pier on the COAST, so technically the more than 2,000 deployed troops’ boots are not on the GROUND, so that doesn’t count. “Besides,” he said, “that J-Lots broad is really talented, so you’ve gotta love those rutabagas!”

Orders are to keep shouting, “I’m not touching you, I’m not touching you…” until Hamas starts bombing the daylights out of them.

The US is building a pier off Gaza to bring in humanitarian aid

US facing obstacles getting aid delivered to Gaza after finishing pier construction

US military finishes Gaza pier, but plans to move it into place paused

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For CCW News, this has been Holy Crap, This is Actually Happening.

I’m Chuck U. Farley.

Good night, and may God help us.

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