Impeach - Poetry Corner

Poetry Corner — Impeach His Ass Today

They are jokes, but they weren’t joking.

 

America in distress

Helena Handbasket

Welcome to the show.

Jim’s birthday week commences with our newest infotainment extravaganza! We lament the imminent shutdown of free speech, the right to self-defense, and so much more!

RIP Tommy Lasorda

Also RIP Tanya Roberts-for real this time

 

News of the Weird & Wonderful

 

Nursing home has COVID-19 vaccine disco party

 

Indiana clothing store owner moved to tears by donation from Barstool Fund

 

Horse Lays Head On Coffin And Gives Touching Farewell To Human Best Friend Before He’s Laid To Rest

 

Teen wins contest with essay about her cat, donates winnings to Ferndale Cat Shelter

 

So many pets have been adopted during the pandemic that shelters are running out

Cancel Culture is cancer (try saying that three times really fast)

Innocent man, who was actually this woman’s hero, was defamed by Social Media and lost his job

Woman Says Man Bear-Hugged Her at Rally to Shield Her From Hostile Crowd

Our new Crust toothpaste ad…

Well, he tried.

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Good News: Natural Immunity to the Coronavirus May Last Years, Study Suggests

 

Bad News: Did you get COVID-19? You may only have 90 days to stay immune

Welcome to the New Abnormal

Nancy attempts a military coup, only one outlet covers it, and they bury the lead

 

Dr. Birx is an elitist hack who doesn’t believe her own rhetoric

 

Surprise! Biden has ties to 5 major tech companies

 

National Teacher of the Year Suggests Mitch McConnell’s Neighbors Attack Him

 

World Health Organization Pledges Not to Find ‘Guilty’ Party in Probe of COVID-19 in China

 

Facebook Deletes 1.7 Million Member Group ‘Joe Biden Is Not My President!’

 

Rep. Cleaver ends opening prayer for new Congress: ‘Amen and awoman’

 

You can now get a citation for being the wrong person beat up by police

 

Poetry Corner

Wolf Zygote returns with another groovy rhyme for the modern time, baby…

The Jimbo Snaps

Jim’s Dear John Letter to the Democratic and Republican Parties.

Florida Man

Florida man seen holding lectern in viral photo has been arrested

 

Florida man clad only in underwear stole mail, attacked homeowner, police say

 

Florida Woman Throws Bucket of Feces on Elderly Landlord: Deputies

 

Not Kidding Around: Woman Sues for Paternity Test on Goats

 

Wine of the Week:

Clos du Bois 2018 Pinot Noir. It was just aiight. The label says it is best paired with a pork or bacon dish…uh…

The Road to De-Mask-Us

The Road to De-Mask Us

Welcome to the show.

A new year is (FINALLY) upon us. We look forward to giving you our best year ever! You can look forward to your old favorites returning, along with new segments and characters you will love! (Max returns soon-we promise!)

We start the show with Jim discussing some changes he has made in his life. After a brief flirtation with the Republican Party, he has decided that what are derisively referred to as RINOs are still essentially the “real” Republicans. Trump was an anomaly, and far too many Republicans have conceded defeat before all has been said and done. Not to mention most GOP politicians put party above people, and will do and say anything to keep their power over you, just like most Dems. So Bye, Felecia! He has now returned to third-party politics, this time joining the American Independent Party, the Nevada affiliate of the Constitution Party. (Melanie, of course, stays fiercely independent.)

Jim also talks briefly about his return to God, and we hear an impromptu Gospel According to Melanie.

Special thanks to our superfans and friends Nick (and Majik) Pierce, and The Dave Clark Five Minus Four for their generous and thoughtful Christmas gifts. See below for details.

Welcome to the New Abnormal

CNN Activist-“Reporter” Jim Acosta Admits He Won’t Cover Biden as Aggressively as Trump

 

Judge Orders Pictures of White Judges Taken Down from Courtroom

 

Indian actor in trouble for playing Indian character with Indian accent 

 

Communist Cuban government broadcast urges citizens to feast on rodent meat for Christmas

 

Even Homer Gets Mobbed. A Massachusetts school has banned The Odyssey

 

Jimmy Galligan, Moral Monster

 

National Teacher of the Year Suggests Mitch McConnell’s Neighbors Attack Him

 

World Health Organization Pledges Not to Find ‘Guilty’ Party in Probe of COVID-19 in China

News of the Weird & Wonderful

 

Woman blames pooch for car crash into ditch: ‘The dog was driving’

 

Boy, 12, identifies 39 airlines by their plane tails for Guinness record

 

When a canal between 2 U.P. towns froze, something magical happened

 

Bob Dylan’s First Original Song in Years Is a 17-Minute Epic About JFK’s Assassination

 

Nail thought to have been used in ‘crucifixion of Christ’ is unearthed in secret chamber of Czech monastery

 

Plato was right. Earth is made, on average, of cubes

 

These dogs are finding feces and saving endangered wildlife

 

Teen from Wildfire-Hit Town Wins $250k Scholarship for Awesome Explanation of Quantum Tunneling

 

Meet the Mushrooms That Could Build a House

 

He Designed A Smartwatch App To Help Stop His Dad’s Nightmares

 

A homeless man rescued all the animals at a shelter after it caught on fire

 

A Boy Scout troop created a ‘hug booth’ for nursing home residents who couldn’t touch their loved ones

 

Man, 70, who walked around the Earth without ever leaving Limerick urges others to keep active in pandemic

 

Beer-holding bloke clears snow on his driveway with a flamethrower

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Connecticut woman busted with scores of neglected animals, including blind owl

 

Bride who faked cancer to raise $11K for ‘dream’ wedding gets 5 months in prison

 

Vicious Squirrel Attacks Queens Community: Like ‘an MMA Cage Match.’

 

Florida Man

Florida man arrested after strapping downed light pole to car roof on highway

 

Transgender Woman Stabs SW Florida Man in Attempt to Steal His Wife

 

Florida Man Explains What Started Outrageous 2AM Pants-Off Viral Video Brawl at Wawa

 

Wine of the Week:

La Garenne 2016 Red Blend…A yummy and mild red with a very slight and pleasant aftertaste that Matched perfectly with the Swiss Colony Brick Cheese and Garlic sausage gifted to us by Mr. and Mr. Pierce. The stopper shown here with our very own logo (and a second one with a Golden Retriever puppy) was gifted to us by Mr. Clark. We love and appreciate you so much!

2016 La Garenne Red Blend

In the Year 2021 (song parody)

Lyrics by Mélanie Hope

Sung by Jim Moniz

 

The CCW crew celebrate the incoming year

What went RIGHT in 2020

As this seemingly all-terrible year comes to a close, many people feel that it couldn’t come soon enough. All you have heard on the news for 365 days is bad, bad bad. It’s time we shared the good, good, good. Welcome to the CCW Annual “What Went Right” broadcast!

Earth, climate, nature

China bans wildlife trade nationwide in a bid to contain Wuhan virus

France to ban use of wild animals in circuses, marine parks

The Kenyan Maasai Who Once Hunted Lions Are Now Their Saviors

Little pygmy possum discovered on Kangaroo Island after fears bushfires had wiped them out

Toronto’s Oldest Tree Will No Longer Be Cut Down Thanks to Last-Minute Decision By City Council

A lonely otter at a sanctuary finds love online through a dating site built just for him

Medical

1st Patients To Get CRISPR Gene-Editing Treatment Continue To Thrive

This is How Close We Are to Eliminating Malaria – 7.6 Million Deaths Averted in 20 Years, Thanks to Generous Nations

Blind Mice Cured of Glaucoma and Damaged Eyes

People are Good

McDonald’s gives an unforgettable Christmas to special family

Pictures he’s drawn

9-Year-old Boy Asks Santa to Give His Hoverboard Away to Grieving Child Who Wanted the Same Gift

South Charleston Police Department giving out special ‘tickets’ to spread holiday cheer

A security guard biked more than 3 miles to return a woman’s lost wallet. Now, his community is raising money to buy him a car

Zoom lifts 40-minute limit for the holidays

50 Frontline Heroes Gifted New Cars For Going Above & Beyond To Help During Pandemic

Community Saves DC Restaurant Known for Serving Less Fortunate

Fla. Man Pays Off Utility Bills for Dozens of Struggling Families for the Second Year in a Row

Cancer Ward Sets Up Dream Wedding For Patient

This Irish Couple Built Homes for Their Employees

A third-grade teacher in Minnesota donated a kidney to her school’s custodian

Orange Man GOOD

One-Hundred-Twenty-Five Amazing Accomplishments of President Donald J. Trump

Schadenfreude

Struggling restaurants ban Andrew Cuomo from dining in NYC

Illegal vendors are overtaking NYC

She’s So Phrytzie-Episode 4

Max helps Phrytzie land a plum job at CNN! How does it work out? Tune in for the answer!

Good things despite COVID

China has made eating wild animals illegal after the coronavirus outbreak.

Only frequent church attendees avoided downward mental health trend in 2020

https://archive.vn/QaYcs

4-Year-Old Feels Lonely In Quarantine, Sets Up A Fairy Garden, Her Neighbor Notices And Pretends To Be A Fairy Named Sapphire For 9 Months

101-year-old WWII vet ‘elated’ by support after losing wife to COVID-19

Toy Store Owner Whose Business Went Under Donates Inventory to Charity

A New York artist spent $65,000 buying art to support fellow artists struggling because of the pandemic

Bus driver who took detour so woman could visit mum in care home

Weird & Wonderful

Amateur codebreakers solve the Zodiac Killer’s cipher after 51 years

20 dogs brought to Miami after being saved from meat market

Superintendent declares a virtual snow day

Wine of the Week

Berry Bomb is a fine red blend with a velvety aftertaste that perfectly complemented our apple pie. Woerh it just for the front and back labels. Widely available.

 

 

A Platefull

Christmas with A Platefull

 

On Third Mic: Sofia from Platefull

We are thrilled to have Melanie’s cousin Sofia Kantola live with us from Washington State!  In addition to being a wife to a great guy (Hi Rod!) and mother to 3 charming and intelligent young men, she is a founder of Kirkland-based Platefull, a non-profit working with multiple food banks in the region to fight hunger. Find out more about them here.

A Fascism Festival

California Taxpayers Can Check Out Any Time They Like, But Lawmakers Still Want To Tax Those Who Leave

 

Traveling for Christmas? These states require a COVID-19 test before entering

 

Doctors suggest CDC should deprioritize elderly for coronavirus vaccine: They’re ‘whiter’ and we should ‘level the playing field

 

Leftists Work to Get Seattle Proud Boys ‘Toys for Tots’ Drive Cancelled, Police Now Involved in Stopping Event

 

Pro-Trump crowd holds rally in Taipei

Only in 2020

Scott Adams hit by YouTube for ‘deceptive’ content

 

Cornell: Corona is enforced for whites only 

 

Ohio’s Arbitrary COVID Rules Allows School Wrestling, But Not Shaking Hands Before Match

 

San Francisco to rename Abraham Lincoln High School because former president did not demonstrate that ‘black lives mattered to him’ 

 

HELEN KELLER ‘ANOTHER PRIVILEGED WHITE PERSON’ … Slammed by Black Activist

News of the Weird & Wonderful

 

Table Thrown at Alleged Monsey Attacker Turned Into Menorah Stand

 

Veteran Receives Furnace After His Stops Working: ‘It Can Only Be God’s Plan’

 

Man Pays Utility Bills for 114 Struggling Families: ‘I Want to Share What I Have’

 

Thief takes off with family’s driveway light bulb, leaves Christmas lights up

 

Porch pirate steals bait box filled with cat poop

 

Rep. Joe Cunningham cracks a beer on house floor during farewell speech

 

Woman raises money for pregnant fast-food worker after customer threw drink at her

 

Florida Man

Florida dogs:

Two dogs rescued from septic tank in Florida

 

Florida raccoon:

Florida woman finds raccoon in her Christmas tree

 

FROM THE ARCHIVES: Florida man ends SWAT standoff for a slice of pizza

 

Florida man wrestles puppy from jaws of hungry alligator

 

A Florida man was scalped by a black panther after he paid $150 for an illegal ‘full contact’ experience at a backyard animal sanctuary